Listen, and let the body speaks

It was a quite busy Tuesday. After my morning sitting meditation, I spent a few hours to tidy up my messy home :P It was a lot of work, and without any breaks, I also needed to prepare dinner before my evening class. The whole time I was having a tight knot in my belly. It was very uncomfortable but I was “too busy” to take care of it. At the end, I finally listened to the message from my body. I decided to spend a few minutes, and just sat down to take a breath. I imagined holding hands with the discomfort, and allow myself to feel it with each breath.

After a while, my discomfort spoke to me, it said,

“I am scared.”

“I am so scared of life.”

“I am scared of people think I am not good enough.”

“I am scared that I am actually not good enough.”

“I am scared of not having a good health.”

“I am scared of being sick.”

“I am very scared.” I listened.

I responded: “My dear feeling, I heard you, but right now I don’t have the answer. I don’t know how to solve this problem. But I am here with you and will listen to you.”

Right away the tight knot was gone, because I was giving enough respect and acceptance to my discomfort. It was shocking, but also a really interesting experience.

I realized that sometimes there is no need to fix the discomfort, there is no urge to find a way to make myself feel better. I just need to be there with my vulnerable self and listen. This is mindfulness, and this is self-care.

May I allow myself to just sit and listen, and be everything I am at the moment.